HORSE
by IshizuWolfRider
Summary: Swearing, but if you read to the end you'll see that it's not really swearing. A simple game between friends that turns serious. A predictable rivalry emerges to unfold into a game that holds two prides at stake.
1. Chapter 1

**Warning: This fic contains swearing, and the writing style is weird, but if you read all the way through, including the author's notes at the end, you will get it.**

Thud.

"Dammit!"

Smack.

"Ow! Winry! What'd you do that for?!"

"No swearing."

"Well you didn't have to hit!"

"Shut it, bean. I'm trying to take my turn."

Smirk. "Miss."

Thud. "Dammit Fullmetal!"

"Keh. Now you're a 'ho' eh, Mustang?"

"You're not one to talk pipsqueak. You're a whore."

Bang, bang, bang. "Here please, sir."

Gulp. "Yes, Ma'am."

Swish.

…...

"Well I'll be damned."

Click. "Language, sir."

"Eh heh. Right. Sorry."

"Who's next?"

"OVER HERE BRAVE LEUITENANT! WINNING AT SUCH A GAME HAS BEEN PASSED DOWN THE ARMSTRONG FAMILY FOR GENERATIONS!"

Swish.

Mutters. "Well, it was easy for him to get it, him being the size of a freakin' skyscraper."

Smack. "No swearing Ed!"

"I didn't say anything!"

"You were about to!"

"That doesn't give you the right to-"

Ka-boom. "Shush Brother. Some people are trying to concentrate."

"Sorry, Al."

Swish.

"Good one Al!"

30 minutes later

Panting. "How can they still be at it?"

"I don't know, Winry. I was out really soon, and this book was in my bag, and I got so caught up in reading it that I wasn't paying attention."

"Yeah. Now it's a battle royal between Ed, Colonel Mustang and Major Armstrong."

Gold meets black. Smirks.

Swish. Swish. Thud.

Tears and sparkles. "OH! GOOD GAME FULLMETAL, FLAME! I SHALL AWAIT THE TIME WHEN I GET THE CHANCE TO PLAY THIS AGAIN. UNTIL THEN, HOWEVER, I MUST RETURN TO MOTHER AND FATHER NOW. GOODNIGHT, GENTLEMEN AND LADIES."

Whispers. "We're never inviting him again, right?"

"Of course not,Fullmetal. It was only bad luck he saw us heading out this time."

"Well maybe if _someone_ had checked to make sure no one else was at the office…"

"It's not my fault! I ordered all my subordinates the day off! I didn't know Armstrong was just returning from Lior!"

Click.

"Stop fighting."

Gulps.

"Yes Ma'am."

"Yes Lieutenant Hawkeye Ma'am."

"Hey Ed, you should restart the game between the two of you, so you guys can finish on fair ground. Right now you're both whores, so the game won't last long. Start over!"

Glares.

"Fine."

"You're going down Mustang!"

"You wish Pipsqueak."

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THEY CAN'T EVEN BE SEEN BY A SPECK OF DUST?!"

"You."

And so, the game of HORSE began.

**Next Time!**

**Ed and Roy face off in their 'game' and of course chaos and the competition between the Fullmetal and Flame Alchemists heat up! Review and vote for who you want to win! The short, blonde adorable chibi with a hyper temper or the calm, stoic handsome Colonel with the gloves to reduce subordinates to ashes?**

**Ha ha! This popped into my head during Gym class. Today was a 'free day' and my friends and I decided to play basketball. We began to play the game HORSE, but we just make a joke to remember what letters we have. If you have H and O, then you're a 'ho', and if you have the letters H, O, and R, then you're a 'whore'. It's just how they sound, and we don't mean anything by it. This was just amusing to me, and it bugged me all day until I couldn't stop laughing about it.**

**For those of you who don't know how to play HORSE, review and I'll reply to tell you. Also, the places are as follows:**

**7. Shescka (It was Nii-sama's idea to put her in here)**

**6. Alphonse Elric**

**5. Winry Rockbell**

**4. Riza Hawkeye**

**3. ALEX LOUIS ARMSTRONG (Shudders. Nii-sama owes me for putting him in here. Not really)**

**2. ??? Roy Mustang or Edward Elric?**

**1. ??? Edward Elric or Roy Mustang?**

**You'll have to tell me who you want to win, and I won't update this unless I get at least 10 votes! Also, did anyone not get what the sound effects were? I hope I didn't make them too confusing. The only one I think is confusing is the 'Ka-boom' one. That is Al using his alchemy to make Ed shut up. He's human in this fic.**

**Panic's Note ---**

**Does it make me a bad person if I want Roy to win? XD. Anyway, VOTE FOR THE WINNING! Please Review or this story will never update! And we can NOT have that! Peace Far.**

**Of course it doesn't make you a bad person! I want people to tell me who's going to win, because I honestly can't decide. So unless people review, this story's not going to be completed anytime soon. SO REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Ready, Fullmetal?"

"After you, Colonel Bastard."

Pause. "Today please."

"Shut up!" Swish.

"Damn."

Swish. Smirk. "My turn."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, shorty, just hurry up."

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THEY COULDN'T EVEN MAKE A SHOT?!"

"You, now shut it and shoot already!"

Swish.

"Happy now?"

"Just pass the ball."

Crackle. Thud. "That's cheating Fullmetal!"

"You said 'anything goes'."

"I thought we weren't including alchemy! Since some," Coughs. "People can't?"

"Well now we are. And by the way, you have an 'h' Mustang."

"Hmph. Fine. My turn to be captain."

Swish. "Your turn."

15 minutes later

"Shut it! I'm trying to shoot."

Sigh. Snap. Snap. Snap.

Explosion.

……………

"Why the hell did you do that?!"

Smirk. "I win. I call it."

Pout. "Not fair. You didn't even shoot. You blew up the ball!"

Yawn. "Oh come on, Ed. It's nighttime already. Let's go home."

"Aw, but Winry!"

Smack. "We're going."

Grumbles. "Fine."

"Bye pipsqueak. Who also lost."

"SHUT IT BASTARD! AND WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE THEM OVER YOUR MOUTAIN OF GODDAMN PAPERWORK?!"

"Huh? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to rub it in your face. It just proves my point."

Suspicious. "What point?"

"That you're too short to reach the rim, shorty."

And so the epic game of HORSE between the Fullmetal and Flame Alchemists came to an end.

The next day Roy, even though he was tired from being chased all night, still smirked as the 'chibi alchemist' boarded the train, and graciously reminded him that they had another match set up for when he returned.

Smirk. "Deal. And next time, I'll win!"

**So…what did you guys think? I finally got off my lazy butt and wrote this, even though I pretty much had no inspiration here…We haven't played HORSE in a while.**

**Um…partial credit to Nii-sama for bugging me to update…Hope it was entertaining to some people, and you…**

**Ah yes! Final scores are as follows:**

**7. Shescka (Once again, credit to Nii-sama's idea to put her in here)**

**6. Alphonse Elric**

**5. Winry Rockbell**

**4. Riza Hawkeye**

**3. ALEX LOUIS ARMSTRONG (Shudders. Nii-sama still owes me for putting him in here. Not really)**

**2. Edward Elric (A.K.A The Chibi Sexy Fullmetal Alchemist)**

**1. Roy Mustang (A.K.A The Tall Sexy Flame Alchemist)**

**T.T I almost feel like I betrayed Ed somehow…By making Roy win…But most reviewers said they wanted Roy to win. Final score is as follows:**

**Roy: 6 votes (ash892, hiya24, Shikiba the Night-Wolf, Panic.and.Pride luv you!!, Gbaby808, and last but certainly not least, my Nii-sama)**

**Ed: 3 votes (ash892, hiya24, IshizuWolfRider)**

**And 1 vote for Riza! From Gbaby808! Sorry I couldn't oblige to your wish, but you later messaged me and voted for Roy (I put you up there as well). ash892 and hiya24 both voted for a tie, and myself because even though Roy is cool, I love Ed more.**

**So, yup! HORSE is over! If you didn't like the way it came out, IT'S YOUR OWN DAMN FAULT! YOU SHOULD'VE REVIEWED DAMMIT!**

**Ahem. So sorry about that…I have this overwhelming need for reviews. Ah well. Hope you enjoyed. BTW, I realized this is my first multi-chaptered fic that I've completed! OMG! Even if it's only a two-shot, DON'T BURST MY BUBBLE!!**

**. Kitty!  
**

**Panic's note –**

**Yes! Roy won! I think I voted for Roy, I can't really remember…Oh well. Enjoyed the story? Then please Review and tell the author how much you enjoyed it! Come on, we all know it was a good story! Peace Far.**

**Yes, I believe you voted for Roy…Yup, you did. Poor Edo…I feel bad that I made him lose AND put in short jokes…even if they were bad…oh well. I personally kinda liked the short jokes. I feel I did alright with them!**


End file.
